


Life, But Not As We Know It

by CaptainJZH



Category: Star Trek: The Original Series, Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-04-13
Updated: 2017-04-13
Packaged: 2018-10-18 07:09:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 9,377
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10611807
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CaptainJZH/pseuds/CaptainJZH
Summary: A dimensional anomaly sends the USS Enterprise not only through time, but to another reality: The world of Steven Universe!For SU fans: Canon divergent right after Storm in the Room.For Trekkies: Takes place during original five year mission, TOS-era.





	1. Just Another Day on the Enterprise (Prologue)

“Captain’s Log, Stardate 5232.1” Captain Kirk entered into his log.

“We are currently enroute to investigate a mysterious anomaly on our sensors, unlike anything we have ever seen before.”

“That’s a rather vague description, Captain,” Spock commented over his shoulder.

“It’s a rather vague reading on the sensors, Mr. Spock.”

“Yes, Captain. Indeed it is.”

“Mr. Chekov?”

“Yes, sir?” the Ensign asked.

“What’s our ETA?”

“Just a few minutes sir.”

“Good. Maintain course Mr. Sulu.”

“Aye, sir.”

When they finally reached the anomaly, they were confronted by a large, bluish-white singularity, pulling everything nearby towards it.

“Some sort of portal, Mr. Spock?”

“Yes, Captain. It appears to be-” He looked back at his console.

“Mr. Spock?”

“Captain, it’s pulling us in.”

Kirk stood up out of his chair.

“Go to Yellow Alert. Mr. Sulu, Full Impulse in reverse.”

“I’m getting no response, sir.”

“Bring us about.”

Sulu punched in the controls, but nothing happened.

“Captain,” Spock began, “The energy waves seem to be holding the ship in place.”

“Go to Warp 1, reverse.”

Again, it did nothing.

“Go to Red Alert. Increase speed!”

Again, nothing. 

Red lights flashed all over the ship. Warning klaxons blared through the speakers.

“Sir!” Chekov exclaimed, “Singularity rapidly approaching!”

“We can see it, Ensign. Mr. Scott!” Kirk called down to Engineering, “How much would it take to get one of your trademark miracles right about now?”

“She’s giving it all she’s got!” Scotty said through the Comm, “If we go to max she’ll tear herself apart!”

“Lieutenant Uhura!” Kirk ordered, “Send out a priority distress signal on all frequencies.”

“Aye, sir.”

Kirk looked at the massive singularity in the viewscreen quickly enveloping the Enterprise and got on the intercom.

“All hands, brace for impact.”

A wave of energy hit the ship like a brick wall and flung everyone out of their chairs and off their feet. Lights flickered on and off. Sparks ignited computer consoles as their power conduits shorted out.

In other words, it was business as usual.

And then everything came to almost a standstill.

Kirk tiredly climbed back into his chair and got on the intercom.

“All decks and stations report in immediately. I want a full damage assessment.”

Kirk turned to Spock, who was staggering back to his console.

“Mr. Spock, any readings on the sensors?”

“Sensors appear to be down at the moment, Captain.”

“Very well, Mr. Spock, you better get to fixing them. Mr. Scott, how are the engines?”

“Well, I don’t think we’ll be able to get beyond thrusters right now. I can get you impulse in maybe...three hours?”

“That may be a problem if we’re still where we were...” Kirk thought out loud.

“Mr. Chekov, what’s our location?”

“Working on it, sir.” Chekov said as he got his fried navigation console working again.

“Mr. Sulu, maintain our current position.”

“Aye, sir.”

“Lieutenant Uhura, damage report.” 

“All decks reporting in with minimal casualties.”

“Any responses to our distress call?”

“None, sir. In fact, I’m not reading any communications at all on Starfleet frequencies.”

“Are the Comm systems working?”

“Partial power, sir.”

“Try to get it back to full power, then check all frequencies and continue the distress call.”

“Aye, sir.”

Kirk sat back in his chair.

“Sir!” Chekov said, turned towards the Captain, “According to these readings our coordinates place us in...Sector 001.”

“Earth?” Kirk paused for a moment. “Mr. Spock?”

“Sensors now at minimal capacity, Captain.”

“Can you confirm our location?”

“Yes, Captain, it appears the singularity has brought us into Earth’s solar system, although it also appears that we have drifted into a small asteroid field.”

“An asteroid field? I don’t recall those being this close to Earth. Is the singularity still open?”

“No, Captain, it seems to have closed just as we exited it.”

A flashing light flickered on the science console. Spock looked down and quickly back up.

“Captain, we’re detecting anomalous readings off the port bow. Small entities, composition unknown.”

“On screen.”

The viewscreen came to life, revealing three, small, bright red beings floating in space. Their uniforms all had a yellow diamond on them in some form. And they all had gemstones embedded into their bodies.

If Kirk had to guess, they were rubies.


	2. Rubies

Doc, Navy, and Army had been floating in space for a while, and had drifted into an asteroid patch in the months since the Crystal Gems had ejected them into space.

To keep herself busy, Doc had been formulating battle strategies for when they would eventually be picked up. Surely Homeworld would come to find them after failing to report back, she thought.

Army and Navy weren’t too far away from Doc, and were holding on to each other so they wouldn’t float away. Army coughed.

“Good view, isn’t it?” Army asked, awkwardly looking out at the stars. She had mostly resigned herself to her fate, and was trying to make the best of it.

“Of course it is! It’s sooooooo beautiful,” Navy replied.

“You can even see Homeworld from here… I think,” Army said. 

She then asked Doc, “How goes the planning?”

“I’ll TELL YOU at the next platoon meeting!” she shouted bitterly.

“See you there then!” Navy said back.

Suddenly, the monotonous tedium of space was interrupted by a massive bluish-white portal opening up in the distance. A giant spaceship came flying out haphazardly, eventually slowing and stabilizing in front of them.

On the side, the words “USS Enterprise: United Federation of Planets” were illuminated by floodlights.

Army gulped.

\---

“Do we have enough transporter power to beam them aboard?” Kirk asked Spock.

“Just barely, Captain.”

“Enough for a site to site transport to the brig?”

“No, Captain.”

“Then send security officers to the transporter room. Mr. Kyle, prepare to beam the three entities aboard.”

“Aye sir,” the transporter chief said through the Comm.

“Captain,” Mr. Spock began, “These entities do not appear to be like anything we’ve ever encountered. Sensors are detecting energy output from within their bodies, but no lifesigns at all.”

“Your point being?”

“My point being, Captain, that we have no idea how these beings will react to the transporter.”

“Point noted. Lieutenant Kyle, do you have a lock on?”

“Yes, sir, though at first the computer could only lock onto a small part of their body. It’s fine now.”

Kirk paused for a moment to think.

“Energize,” he ordered.

“Aye sir.”

Kirk got up out of his chair and entered the turbolift.

“I’ll go meet our new...guests. Mr. Spock, you have the Conn. Keep me informed.”

“Aye, Captain.”

Kirk walked into the transporter room. Two security guards were standing by the transporter pads. Mr. Kyle was working the controls.

“I’m having trouble maintaining their patterns, Captain,” Kyle said, “The matter-to-energy ratio isn’t like anything I’ve ever seen.”

“Boost the matter gain.”

“Trying, sir.”

Three, small round objects began to materialize on the pads.

“That’s what the computer originally locked onto. I can’t seem to get the rest of them!”

“Give it to me.”

Kyle moved over and Kirk took the controls. But before Kirk could do anything, the three round objects became humanoid and fully-materialized on the pads.

“What did you do?” Kyle asked.

“I didn’t do anything,” Kirk said as he approached the three red beings on the pad.

The one with the ruby on their navel stood in the back of the alcove looking at them in awe. The one with a ruby on their arm looked around frantically, on alert. The one with a ruby on her chest, who also sported a yellow visor over her eyes, hopped off the pad.

“What in the stars is going on?!” she asked.

“I’m Captain James T. Kirk of the United Starship Enterprise. We just beamed you onto our ship,” Kirk said, kneeling down to the alien’s level, “Who are you?”

“Oh, um,” the small alien said, making a diamond-symbol with her arms, “Ruby-2R4, Cut-3NF.”

“Right…” Kirk said, scratching his chin, “Are you a...Captain of some kind?”

“I…suppose you could say that.” the Ruby said awkwardly, “Wait! You’re a human, right?”

“Have you met humans before?”

“Well, one, once. Kinda twice, actually. That’s kind of why we were in space. But how in the world do humans have a ship THIS BIG?! None of the records said the Earth had stuff like THIS!”

Kirk’s communicator beeped. He took it out and opened it.

“Kirk here.”

“Captain,” Spock said, “Please report to the bridge.”

“On my way.” Kirk said before putting away his communicator. He turned to Visor Ruby. 

“These guards are going to take you to sickbay for a checkup. Don’t be alarmed.”

“...Okay.” the Ruby said.

As the three were escorted out of the room, Kirk got out his communicator again.

“Kirk to Dr. McCoy.”

A familiar voice rang out through the communicator.

“I was wondering when you’d call up little ol’ me! Whatever it is you did back there gave me a good helping of bruise patients and a satisfactory dose of half my medicine supply crashing to the floor!”

“Sorry to hear that, Bones, but I just called to inform you that you have three...interesting patients coming your way for a checkup, fresh off the transporter pad.”

“Fine.”

Kirk went up the bridge and approached Spock.

“Lieutenant,” Spock began, gesturing to Uhura, “Tell the Captain what you just told me.”

“Well sir, we got the communications system back up to full power and-”

“And what?”

“Should I just put it on screen?”

Spock nodded.

With the press of a button, a flash of information appeared on screen. 

21st Century information.

Television cartoons, feature films, internet videos, popular music...

“Mr. Sulu, what stardate does the chronometer say?”

“No stardate at all, sir.”

“Captain,” Spock began, “According to the evidence I’ve been able to gather, we are in what this era’s calendar would call… ‘The 2010s.’ ”


	3. Alternate Earth

“Spock, can you shield us from this decade’s scanning technology?”

“Yes, Captain.”

“Then do it.”

Kirk stood in thought for a moment. He had a hunch that this was a bit more than just time travel.

“Also...search for the town of Portage Creek, Indiana.”

“Captain?”

“That’s an order.”

“Yes, Captain.”

Suddenly, McCoy called up to the bridge.

“Jim, one of these…Rubies wants to see you before I begin any sort of examination. Now.”

“I’ll be right there.”

Kirk shut off the comm link.

“Captain,” Spock asked, “I’ve searched for the location you requested.”

“And?”

“While it is in the ship’s databanks as the location of the historic Millennium Gate, it does not appear to exist at all on this Earth, despite the gate’s completion date being in the year 2012.”

“Alternate universe?”

“I believe so, Captain. This is supported by the fact that several landmasses on this Earth have been significantly altered.”

Images of the Earth currently nearby flashed on the screen.

“The area known as Florida does not seem to exist, also South America and Africa appear to have broken apart differently, India is cut in two, Siberia has been reduced to a crater, and so on.”

“Any evidence of what could have caused this?”

“Negative, Captain, but we will keep searching as we get in closer scanning range.”

“I’ll be in Sickbay. Keep me posted.”

“Yes, Captain.”

\---

“Alright, I’m here,” Kirk said as he entered Sickbay. The Rubies were sitting on the sickbay beds.

“He pointed a deadly object at us!” the Visor Ruby said.

“This?” Bones protested as he held up a scalpel.

The Naval Ruby let out a huge gasp.

“I am so terrified!” she cried out.

“I promise we won’t hurt you,” Kirk said, “Now can I ask you some questions?”

“Only if you answer my question from earlier,” the Visor Ruby said.

Kirk sighed. Technically, he figured, since this was an alternate universe, the Temporal Prime Directive did not apply. And since this species was most likely warp-capable, the regular Prime Directive could be bent somewhat in order to figure out what was going on.

He could delay giving them an answer, but that, he figured, could spark distrust and prevent him from getting answers from them.

“We are from the future, from what humans would call the 23rd Century, but also an alternate universe, separate from yours. We came here via some sort of spacetime anomaly and are attempting to find a way back. There. Now may we proceed?”

“...Fine,” Visor Ruby said, confused.

Bones began looking at Naval Ruby first as Kirk asked questions.

“So,” Kirk began, “What are your names?” 

He gestured to Visor Ruby.

“Earlier, I asked who you were and you said ‘Ruby’ and then some sort of...identification number?”

“Yeah, that’s correct.”

Kirk turned to the other two Rubies.

“And you two are…?”

Visor Ruby nodded to them, presumably giving them permission to answer.

They both made a diamond symbol with their arms and recited their respective identification numbers. At the same time.

“One at a time, please.”

Again, they tried to state their IDs, but each time one would start, the other would also try to start.

“Oh, sorry, you go,” the Naval Ruby said flirtatiously.

“No, you!” Arm Ruby said back, frustrated.

“No, you!”

“Okay, okay,” Kirk said, silencing them, “Where do you come from?”

“From Homeworld!” Arm Ruby said loudly

“Okay... What species are you?”

“We’re...Gems?” Naval Ruby said confusedly.

“Bones, what do you read?” Kirk asked, giving up on the questions.

“Jim, I wish I could tell ya but all this thing is detecting is light energy and some sort of silicate mass emanating from these gemstones of theirs. It’s unlike anything I’ve ever seen, and that is saying something!”

Kirk turned back to the Rubies.

“From what I was able to figure, all three of your names are ‘Ruby,’ followed by an ID code. Do you have any way of telling each other apart besides that?”

Visor Ruby was about to speak, but Naval Ruby interrupted.

“I liked the names that human gave us!”

“Is this the same human that one of you said stranded you in space?”

“Yeah! I’m Navy, he’s Army-”

“Now wait just a minute-!” Army protested.

“And he’s Doc!” Navy finished, with a smile Kirk could have swore was smug.

“Doc?” Bones asked.

“I presume a name like theirs would have been inappropriate,” Kirk muttered with a slight smile on his face.

“So,” Kirk began,”I presume ‘Ruby’ is your race?”

They all shrugged.

“Okay. Okay…” Kirk said, putting his hand to his forehead, “Let’s start from the beginning, here. What exactly led you to being stranded in space?”

Doc jumped off the bed she was sitting on.

“We were sent to Earth to look for Jasper! And then the Crystal Gems tricked us into playing something called ‘baseball,’ and THEN they said Jasper was on Neptune, BUT *THEN* IT TURNED OUT SHE WASN’T ON NEPTUNE, so we went BACK to Earth and found Jasper, but it turned out Jasper WASN’T REALLY JASPER, and then we got shoved out the airlock into SPACE!”

Kirk paused to take in all of this fairly vague information.

“Okay… Who is Jasper?”

“She’s the greatest!” cried out Army.

“The...greatest?” Kirk asked. This wasn’t exactly going anywhere.

Kirk pulled up a chair and sat down.

“I think,” Kirk said, “I’m going to need a little more info here.”

“Okay. Yellow Diamond gave us orders to go to Earth-”

“Is this ‘Yellow Diamond’ your leader?”

“Well, YEAH,” all three of them said.

Bones gave Kirk a sarcastic “Wasn’t it obvious?” look.

“Anyway, we were sent to Earth because we needed to retrieve Jasper.”

“And Jasper is…?”

“She’s the best war hero in the history of Homeworld!” Navy said, almost swooning.

“That so?” Bones said jokingly.

“Bones,” Kirk scolded.

“Jasper jumped out of ships in orbit, swam across oceans, and could take out a hundred Crystal Gems without breaking a sweat!” Doc proclaimed.

“The Crystal Gems? Who are they? Some sort of separate race?”

“They’re rebels!” interrupted Army, “They stopped the colony from being built, they tricked us into BASEBALL and going to NEPTUNE, they threw us into SPACE-!”

“Yes,” Kirk said, focusing on each question one at a time, “So these ‘rebels,’ the Crystal Gems, threw you out into space. Why?”

“I DUNNO! Their Amethyst had shape-shifted into Jasper-”

“She *shapeshifted*?” Kirk asked.

“Makes sense,” Bones said, “If their composition is what I think it is it shouldn’t be that hard to change their body shape.”

Doc continued, “She fooled us into thinking she was Jasper, took us to the Moonbase and all to ‘file a report,’ but then we once we found her out one of them opened the airlock-”

“-and threw you into space,” Kirk finished, “You said there was a ‘Moonbase’ this ‘Amethyst’ tricked you into going to?”

“Yeah. I think it was used during the war for planning and stuff.”

“War? What war?”

“Happened about 6,000 years ago from what I was told. The Crystal Gems disrupted the Earth’s colonization process and rebelled against the Diamonds.”

“The Earth was going to be colonized?”

“Yeah.”

“And the Crystal Gems disagreed with this, I take it?”

“Uh-huh.”

“I think the pieces are coming together here. But why was Jasper on Earth?”

“Oh, we’re not high up enough to be trusted with THAT info, Captain.”

“Are you fairly low-ranking on your world?”

“You could say that,” Doc chuckled, “It’s what we were made for, am I right?”

Kirk and Bones looked at each other.

This day was going to be weirder than usual.


	4. Escape

“Can we have a tour?” Navy asked oh-so innocently.

“A tour?” Kirk began to ask.

“WE DON’T HAVE TIME FOR THIS!” Army interrupted, “The other two are still floating in space, and Jasper is still on Earth!”

Doc paused, looking back at Kirk.

“I...uh…You said something about a tour?” she asked, blushing somewhat.

“Well, I didn’t say anything about one, but there is a security risk...”

Navy began giving serious puppy-dog eyes, which Kirk couldn’t help but melt at.

“...that would be mitigated if I just showed you some low-risk areas first.”

“That sounds reasonable!” Doc said with a goofy smile.

As they walked out into the corridor, security officers in tow, Kirk thought it was a good time to ask more questions.

“You said that it was because of a human that you ended up in space,” he began, “Who was that human?”

“Oh, just some member of the Crystal Gems.”

“Right… Now how many of these Crystal Gems were there?”

“Four, I think, or maybe six? I’m not sure.”

“How did you three meet, exactly?”

“We were assigned to the same platoon. I was made leader because I came out the best.”

Army silently grumbled at this.

“Came out?”

“From the Kindergarten.”

“I’m afraid you lost me.”

“Kindergartens are where Gems are made. They’re like these big, giant chasms where Gems pop out the sides.”

“Ah, I see,” Kirk said, just barely getting any of this, “Now, you said earlier that you were ‘made’ to be low-ranking?”

“Of course! Every Gem has a spot in the hierarchy. Rubies have their place, Pearls have their place, Peridots have their place…”

“And you’re fine with this?”

“Sure I am! Most Rubies don’t even get a command position; Those are usually left to the Agates.”

“Right…”

“Bridge to Captain Kirk,” Spock said out of Kirk’s communicator.

“Kirk here, go ahead.”

“Captain, I think I have made a breakthrough in solving our current situation. Please report to the bridge.”

“I’ll be right there.”

Kirk turned back to the Rubies.

“Mr. Drake and Mr. Nichols here will have to conduct the tour, I’m afraid.”

As Kirk walked away, Mr. Nichols kneeled down to the Rubies’ level.

“So, where would you like to go? The officer’s lounge, the shuttle bay, engineering-?”

Navy’s eyes seemed to light up.

“Ooh, a shuttle bay!” she said in her usual, cute tone.

Mr. Nichols couldn’t resist.

\---

“Captain,” Spock said when Kirk arrived on the bridge, “It appears that we might be able to trigger the singularity again. According to the sensor logs, there was an unusual neutrino wave passing through at the site just before it began pulling us in. If we recreate that in the same region, it stands to reason that it could bring us back to our own universe and time.”

“How long do you think it would last?”

“Unknown. Though I would recommend destroying the singularity once we pass through.”

“That would make sense. Get to work on it.”

“Sir,” Uhura began, “Security reports that the three entities have assaulted two officers and escaped their custody.”

“Do we know where they’re headed?”

“No, sir.”

“Go to Red Alert.”

“Sir, we’re still on Red Alert from when we entered the singularity.”

“Right. Mr. Spock, can you make a specialized internal scan for their energy signatures?”

“Already done Captain,” Spock said, “Internal sensors are now detecting readings much like the three entities inside the Shuttlecraft Columbus.”

“Get some security officers down there. Can you try to lock them out?”

“Too late, Captain. They’re already in.”

Doc flicked several switches at the control panel on the Columbus, hoping that some combination would work. Army was trying to get the door shut. Navy was waving goodbye to the security guards charging towards them.

“I did it!” Doc shouted as the Columbus powered up. The shuttlecraft lifted off the ground quickly, almost hitting the ceiling.

“Get in!” Army shouted to Navy, who was still hanging out the doorway.

Navy went to her seat and Army followed suit after shutting the door.

“Does this thing have any weapons?” Army asked.

“Try that one,” Doc said as she maneuvered the craft closer to the exit doors.

Army pressed a button and the computer’s robotic, female voice said, “Warning: Deflector shield overload imminent.”

“What does that mean?” Navy asked from the backseat.

Suddenly, the shuttle’s deflector shields let out a large burst of energy, breaking right through the exit doors of the hangar.

“Let’s get out of here!” Doc excitedly said as the shuttlecraft sped out of the hangar.

“Captain,” Spock said to Kirk, “They’ve broken through the shuttlebay doors.”

“Can they get past our shields?”

“Yes. Unfortunately, shields are still unstable from our encounter with the singularity.”

“Tractor beam?”

“Inoperable, Captain”

“Can we give chase?”

“Impulse engines are still offline.”

Kirk sat down in his chair, slumped over.

“Captain,” Spock began, “I believe that since they have taken a piece of our 23rd century technology, we are now a part of whatever it is these three beings’ mission entails.”

“Which means,” Kirk muttered, “We *are* involved in their political affairs…”

“Whether we like it or not.”


	5. Back to the Mission

Leggy had been floating in space for several months. She had become extremely terrified of everything, and was starting to see things that weren’t even there.

“Aaah!” she screamed, spinning around to attack the black, star-filled vacuum.

She opened her eyes to discover a small ship heading towards her. Leggy cowered at the sight of it.

The ship turned around and stopped right next to Leggy. The door opened.

“Ruby! Fall in!” Doc shouted.

Leggy instantly forced herself upright and floated through the door, collapsing at the force of the artificial gravity.

“How long has it been?” she cried out as she clumsily got up.

“Lost count a while ago,” Army said from her seat, “But we still have a mission to do!”

“That is correct,” Doc said as she returned to the central console, “And if I’m reading this right, we just have one more stop to make.”

\---

Eyeball was still fuming at the sight of the Earth. She had been thrown away from Rose Quartz’s bubble back in the Earth’s direction, propelling her back there at a relatively slow speed.

Then one day she saw a small ship begin to approach her at high speeds. It stopped just underneath her. Navy appeared in the entryway.

“Yoo-hoo!” she called out.

Eyeball grabbed onto the ship’s sides and climbed in.

“It’s about TIME!” she shouted.

“Good to have everyone back,” Doc said, “Setting course for Earth!”

The ship swung around and blasted back to Earth.

She would finally be able to bring back the gem of Rose Quartz, Eyeball thought with an insidious grin.

\---

“Captain!” Scotty said, calling up to the Bridge from Engineering.

“Yes, Mr. Scott?”

“I got ya impulse power, sir! It’s only temporary but it’s enough to get you into orbit and maintain it for a good while.”

“That’s just the news I needed to hear, Mr. Scott. Mr. Sulu,” Kirk said, “Take us into Earth orbit, Full Impulse. Mr. Spock, continue concealing us from the Earth’s scanners.”

“Captain,” Spock said, “Sensors indicate the Shuttlecraft Columbus is returning to Earth.”

“What’s their ETA and destination?”

“Their current trajectory is taking them on a course towards a small peninsula on the North American continent’s eastern seaboard. Estimated time of arrival: 30 minutes.”

“And what’s ours?”

“5 minutes, sir.”

“Good thing they don’t know how to get that thing up to full speed yet.”

“Captain,” Spock said, “We just lost the Columbus on sensors.”

“How?”

“The deflector overload that blew open the shuttlebay doors appears to have resulted in a graviton leakage, causing an accidental, semi-cloaking effect on the Columbus.”

“So we won’t know where they are until they’re already on the ground…”

Kirk turned to Uhura. 

“Lt. Uhura, tell the transporter room to prepare to beam down an away team. Mr. Spock, you’re with me. Uhura, inform Dr. McCoy that he’s coming too. Mr. Sulu, you have the Conn.”

“Aye sir.”

As Kirk and Spock stepped into the turbolift, Spock spoke.

“Captain, I doubt our uniforms will help us blend into the populace of this era nor this universe.”

“Well then, we’ll just have to pick up some new threads, Mr. Spock,” Kirk said with a smile.

When they got to the transporter room, Bones was waiting.

“What on Earth are we doing?!” he asked loudly.

“Those three beings, the ‘Rubies,’ have stolen a shuttlecraft and are heading towards Earth,” Kirk explained.

“We’re at Earth? I swear, nobody tells me anything.”

“Yes,” Spock began, “But the anomaly we went through earlier has brought us to an alternate Earth, in an alternate universe.”

“Of course it did. So we just have get our stuff back and go home, is that it?” Bones asked.

“I hope that’ll be it,” Kirk said.

“Mr. Sulu,” Kirk said into his communicator, “Have we entered orbit?”

“Yes, sir. Within transporter range of the designated coordinates.”

“Thank you, Mr. Sulu. Mr. Kyle, prepare to transport.”

“Aye sir.”

The three-person Away Team stepped onto the transporter pads and were beamed down.

Hopefully, Kirk thought, this wouldn’t have to get any more complicated than it needed to be.


	6. Welcome to Beach City

Ronaldo was taking out the trash behind the fry shop, simultaneously calling into a live recording of one of his favorite conspiracy podcasts.

He profoundly disagreed with the podcaster on her interpretation of the diamond symbol on the dollar bill, but he could respect a good theory when he heard one.

“The diamond is clearly a symbol of the Great Diamond Authority. I swear, I saw one of their agents on my TV almost a year ago!” he said into his wireless headset, “They said it was just some random signal hijacker, but I don’t buy it. Oh, I understand how you came to the conclusion that it was connected to the snake symbol as a hint to the location of the one percent’s secret gold deposits, but I personally don’t see the connection.”

Suddenly, he heard a strange noise around a nearby corner.

“I have to go,” Ronaldo said quietly, “It’s been good being on here again, Norene. Bye.”

Ronaldo pulled off his headset and put down the trash bags. He heard voices from behind the corner.

“Do you think it’s a good idea to beam down into a populated area like this?” an older, somewhat southern voice asked.

A calm, more calculated voice answered.

“Doctor, the population density of this area is extremely sparse, and there is a higher likelihood of us finding reasonable disguises. If we had beamed into a forest or field, we would look even more out of place than we most likely already are.”

“Spock,” a low, commanding voice said, “I think I see a clothes shop over there. Let’s get you a hat for those ears and something to replace our uniforms.”

Ronaldo pressed his back against the wall. He got out his phone and began recording.

“This is a breaking news update from Keep Beach City Weird,” he whispered, “I have just witnessed top secret operatives of an unknown origin infiltrating the Beach City boardwalk! More details to come as they develop.”

\---

“What do you think, Bones?” Kirk asked with a smile.

He was wearing a shirt that said, “Professional Beach Hunk.”

Bones chuckled. “You haven’t seen a beach since that trip to Risa a few years back.”

“My figure still matches, though.”

“Just barely, Captain,” Spock said as he came out of a changing room with a “Greetings From Funland” shirt, a white sun-hat, and a tote bag hiding his tricorder.

“That shirt suits you, Spock,” Bones said.

Bones himself had a “Property of Beach City, Delmarva” shirt on.

“Okay,” Kirk told them quietly, “Since we don’t have any money, I suggest we make our way to the restroom over there and...exit.”

The cashier was too busy reading a book titled “Passions of Xanxor” to notice them. After glancing at the cover, Kirk thought he might enjoy it himself if he had the chance to read it.

After the three had climbed out the back window, Spock discreetly took out his tricorder.

“No reading yet on the Columbus, Captain, but I am reading-”

He was interrupted by a crash and a loud roar.

“Follow me.” Kirk ordered as he cautiously walked out of the back alley.

A giant monster of some kind came running onto the boardwalk and crashed into one of the buildings, a pizza shop, attempting to climb it. Several of the workers inside ran out screaming.

“Mr. Spock, can you get a reading?” Kirk asked.

“Yes, sir. It appears to be similar to the species the ‘Rubies’ belonged to.”

“Yeah,” McCoy whispered, “I think they said it was called ‘Gems-’”

Without warning, a giant woman with dark, square-shaped hair and reddish skin dive-bombed the monster, grabbed it by the tail, and threw it towards the beach.

“Amethyst!” she called out.

“On it!” a smaller, long-haired woman with purple skin said in the distance as she turned herself into a spinning ball of light.

“Spock…” Kirk said in disbelief.

“Same composition as the Rubies, Captain. They are indeed, ‘Gems.’”

The purple woman, now known as Amethyst, wrapped the monster up with a whip, which had seemingly emerged from nowhere (at least from the Away Team’s point of view). Suddenly, the monster broke free of the whip and Amethyst was sent flying back towards the boardwalk, hitting the giant reddish woman in the process.

“Do you think they know each other?” Bones asked with a hint of sarcasm.

As the monster moved closer to the two others, small boy who looked no older than ten years of age came running up the beach.

“Crystal...Gems!” he hollered as his bellybutton glowed pink underneath his red shirt. A pink shield suddenly appeared in his hand, which he threw at the monster’s head.

The monster then began walking towards the boy, giving the other two time to get up and charge at it from behind.

As they attacked it, another Gem, pale white with teal clothes, jumped out from one of the roofs and stabbed it with a white spear. The monster then exploded into a puff of smoke, a gemstone falling to the ground in its place.

“Gentlemen,” Kirk said as he stood up fully, “I think we’ve found those ‘Crystal Gems’ we’ve heard so much about.”

\---

“I’m sorry I was late to the party,” Pearl said, “That other one was quite the doozy.”

“Don’t worry,” Garnet said as she created and sent off a bubble containing the fallen monster gem, “Steven and Amethyst were more than enough help.”

“Aw, thanks Garnet!” Steven said.

“Though next time we should probably split up evenly.”

“Sounds logical,” Pearl said.

Three men in tacky tourist shirts were standing by watching them over to the side. For a moment, Steven found this to be odd because it wasn’t quite the tourist season yet, but he brushed it off, as there were still people who came to Beach City no matter the time of year. One of the men, wearing a “Professional Beach Hunk” shirt, came up to them.

“Hi!” the man said awkwardly, “That was certainly an amazing thing you did back there.”

“All in a day’s work!” Steven said proudly.

“I’m surprised you stuck around during that,” Pearl commented, “Usually humans run away screaming whenever this happens.”

The man chuckled, “I can’t say I’ve seen worse, but I’ve certainly seen...similar in my time.”

He knelt down to Steven’s level and stuck out his hand.

“My name is Jim; Jim Kirk. How about you?”

“I’m Steven,” Steven said as he shook Kirk’s hand, “Member of the Crystal Gems!”

Kirk stood up.

“What is it you Crystal Gems do, exactly?”

“We defend the Earth and humanity and junk,” Amethyst said in her usual nonchalant manner.

“And how many of you are there?”

“There’s us,” Steven explained, “and Peridot, and Connie...maybe Lapis…”

Kirk seemed to be lost in thought for a second or so, after which he said, “I’d be very interested to learn more.”

“I’m impressed,” Pearl said, “Rarely are humans this curious about us.”

“I find that quite surprising,” Kirk replied with a little smile.

“Who are those two over there?” Steven asked, pointing to the two men that were accompanying Kirk. They looked like they were arguing.

“Oh,” Kirk said, “Those are just two of my friends. We’re...travelling together. That monster you just fought, is that a common occurrence around here?”

“You better believe it, buster,” Amethyst told him.

“Amethyst,” Garnet scolded, “Don’t be rude.”

“Jim!” one of Kirk’s friends, the one in the “Property of Beach City” shirt, called out.

“I have to go,” Kirk told the Crystal Gems, “It’s been good meeting you.”

“Bye!” Steven said as Kirk walked away.

What an interesting guy, Steven thought.


	7. Gems in the Country

“Bones, what is it?”

“Spock found something on the tricorder.”

“What, Spock?”

“Captain,” Spock began, “I am detecting unusual readings to the southwest. Two ‘Gems,’ as they are called, several kilometers from this city.”

“The Rubies?” Bones asked.

“No,” Kirk said, “The gravitons would have been wiped away by their entry into the atmosphere; We would have detected the Columbus. And their ETA was 30 minutes, which gives us a good 20 more to find them. Not to mention that there were three, plus two they said were floating in space.”

“I would not rule out the possibility, Captain,” Spock said, “that the Rubies managed to keep the graviton leak going during atmospheric reentry, nor the possibility that the two in space perished there or that some of them were lost during, before, or after reentry.”

“Good point Spock,” Kirk said, “In that case we’ll need a way to their location. There’s no way we can get there on foot fast enough. Let’s go.”

“Point to point transport?” Bones suggested as they began walking up the boardwalk.

Kirk took out his communicator.

“Kirk to Mr. Scott, do we have enough power for a point to point transport?”

“That’s a negative, sir,” Scott said, “All our remaining power’s tied up in keeping the ship in orbit and transporter range.”

“What if we beam onto the pads and then they beam us back down?”

“We only have enough for one beam up for the lot of ya and that’s that, or else we’ll lose orbit.”

“Keep working on it, Mr. Scott, Kirk out. Okay men, let’s find us a ride.”

\---

Meanwhile, the Rubies were failing miserably.

“Can’t this thing go any faster?” Eyeball asked impatiently.

“No, it can’t!” Doc shouted.

“Have you checked?”

“How?!”

“I DON’T KNOW! But I don’t think it should be going this slow!”

Navy had a big smile on her face as they argued.

“Oh you two,” she teased.

Leggy was covering her ears.

“If you think this hunk of junk can go faster, then prove it!” Doc said, getting out of her seat.

Army’s eyes widened. This was highly irregular for a platoon commander to do.

Eyeball practically ran into the pilot seat, eagerly putting her hands on the controls.

Then she realized: She had no idea what anything on there meant.

But she was smarter than the average Ruby, and quickly tried to figure out which buttons did what.

She tried comparing the controls of the ship to what she saw of the ones on the Roaming Eye.

Eyeball took a wild guess, and shoved forward two levers.

The ship shot forward at Full Impluse, knocking Doc off her feet.

“Now what’d I tell you???” Eyeball happily proclaimed.

Navy was laughing at Doc. 

Doc chose not to do anything about it.

\---

“Thanks for the ride,” Kirk said, “Mister…”

“Universe.”

“Right.”

“It says so right on the van,” McCoy commented with a smirk.

“It is rather obvious, Captain,” Spock said.

The man who had given them a lift drove off, his van emblazoned with a big “Mr. Universe” logo on the sides.

“Mr. Spock...shut up. Now let’s track down those readings.”

Spock and McCoy took out their tricorders and they began combing the area.

The trio eventually found themselves at a small farm. The cornfields were tall and growing, strawberry bushes were in full bloom, and a lawnmower with a satellite dish strapped to it was roaming the grounds on its own.

Aside from that last part, it reminded Kirk of being back home in Iowa.

“LAPIS!” a nasally, high-pitched voice cried out.

A thin, bright blue lady with water-wings protruding from her back flew out from behind the cornfields, setting down in front of the light-red barn.

“What?” she asked, somewhat annoyed.

“DID YOU SEE MY SEASON 2 DVD SET?”

“You don’t have to shout, and no, I did not.”

“You sure? I distinctly remember you watching the season finale last week.”

“Well I put it the case on the couch. Did you look under the cushions?”

“...No.”

Lapis rolled her eyes and flew off back to behind the cornfields, fashion magazine in-hand.

Kirk shrugged.

“Well they aren’t Rubies,” he said.

“Maybe they know each other,” McCoy said jokingly.

“Bones, you might be onto something.”

“Now wait just a minute-”

“What do you say we go introduce ourselves?” Kirk said before walking off.

McCoy and Spock looked at each other and ran after him.

\---

Peridot pulled her Camp Pining Hearts Season 2 DVD case out of the couch cushions.

“Oh thank the stars,” she murmured.

Then she opened the case up, revealing that it was empty.

“LAPIS!”

Lapis called out from the fields, “CHECK THE DVD PLAYER!”

“Oh…”

“Excuse me?” a voice asked from down below.

Peridot looked over the edge of the pickup truck and saw three humans in front of the barn.

“Uh, hello up there!” one of them said.

“Who are you?” Peridot asked, stepping out and floating down on a trash can lid.

“I’m James Kirk, and these are my friends Spock and McCoy. We have a few questions we’d like to ask.”

“I’m Peridot. Now ask away!”

\---

“What are you going to ask?” McCoy whispered into Kirk’s ear.

“I don’t know; I’m making this up as I go.”

McCoy looked over at Spock with a look that just screamed “Why do we listen to him?” Spock just raised his eyebrow inquisitively, as usual.

“We were wondering,” Kirk began, “Have you seen any bright red little ladies with square hair running around here?”

“Not for a while, no.”

Kirk would have been surprised by her nonchalantness if he hadn’t have been through his fair share and a half of weird this particular day.

“How much of a while?”

“A few months. And even then they should still be floating in space. Come to think of it we should really do something about those Rubies…”

“And they came here specifically?”

“Yeah! The first time Steven tricked them into playing baseball, but the last time Amethyst shapeshifted into Jasper and got them to go to the Moon and… Wait a minute, why are you asking?”

Kirk put on his trademark poker face and tried to think of a decent explanation.

“Oh we’re just passing through…” McCoy said.

“Bones!”

Kirk walked over to McCoy and whispered “If this is where the Rubies landed the last two times, it’s logical to assume they’ll come here once they get to Earth. Spock?”

“Yes, Captain, that is a logical assumption.”

Kirk turned back to Peridot.

“Ignore my associate here; We...need a place to wait while our next ride gets here.”

“Ooh, are you like those hitchhikers from Camp Pining Hearts episode 217?”

“...Yes,” Kirk said, now bluffing his way through a mission much more than usual, “So if it wouldn’t be any trouble, could we wait here for a little while?”

“Well of course,” Peridot said, “LAPIS WE HAVE GUESTS!”

McCoy pulled Kirk aside.

“So we’re just gonna sit around here playing tiddly-winks just WAITING for the Rubies to attack, if they ever even do?!”

“That’s exactly what we’re going to do, Doctor,” Kirk said, “And you’re going to enjoy it. That’s an order.”


	8. Attack

Chekov looked down at the science console in disbelief.

“Sir? I think I found something you might want to see.”

Sulu got out of the Captain’s chair and went over to where Chekov was.

“What is it?” he asked.

“A Neutrino surge, sir. Moving through space.”

“Heading?”

“Same as the Columbus before we lost it on sensors.”

“Alright,” Sulu said as he sat back down in the Captain’s chair, “Shields up. Ready phasers.”

“Scotty to Bridge,” Scotty called over the comm, “Mr. Sulu, I can give you shields or phasers. Take your pick.”

Sulu paused for a moment, then said, “Phasers on full. Target the highest concentration of neutrinos.”

\---

Meanwhile, aboard the Columbus, Doc and Eyeball were arguing.

“I’m in command here!” Doc hollered.

“Your ‘commanding’ got us tricked into a baseball game and shot into space!”

“That’s enough!” Doc shouted, pulling Eyeball out of pilot’s seat and shoving her to the floor. Doc turned around and walked back to the pilot’s seat.

“When I file the mission report back on Homeworld, I’m strongly recommending you for Harvesting Dut-”

Doc felt a sharp pain in her back. She looked down and saw Eyeball’s knife going through her belly. 

She turned back to Eyeball and managed to get out, “You clo-” before poofing away, her gem falling to the floor.

“Anyone else?!” Eyeball asked with an almost crazy look in her eye.

Army and Leggy shook their heads, terrified.

Navy just said, “Nope!” in her usually cheery tone.

Suddenly, the Columbus was being fired upon. Sparks flew around the cabin.

“We got company!” Eyeball cried out.

Eyeball picked up Doc’s Gem and tossed it behind her. Leggy caught it, still in shock.

Eyeball kicked the Columbus into high-gear and dodged the phaser bursts coming from the Enterprise.

“Idiot was taking us right by ‘em,” Eyeball muttered.

She pointed to Army and ordered, “You! Get on that other seat and try to return fire!”

Army quickly sat down at the second control panel and tried to remember what they did that blew open the shuttlebay doors.

On the Enterprise, Scotty was trying to keep the phasers powered.

“Reroute the auxiliary!”

“Mr. Scott,” Sulu called down, “We’re running out of phaser power up here!”

“Aye, I’m giving it all she’s got!”

“Columbus closing to visual range, sir!” Chekov said on the Bridge.

“On screen. Lock photon torpedoes on their propulsion systems and fire,” Sulu ordered.

Army slammed her hand down on the control panel, causing the shuttle’s deflectors to let out another burst of energy, stronger than the one before.

At that same moment, the Enterprise fired three torpedoes at the Columbus.

“Evasive!” Sulu shouted as the energy pulse approached on screen.

The whole Enterprise shook when the energy burst hit them. It struck the lower half of the saucer section, and parts of the torpedo bay.

“Torpedoes off the front and to the right!” Army called out.

“Let’s see how they do in an atmosphere,” Eyeball quipped, taking the Columbus into reentry in an attempt to outrun the gaining torpedos.

“Uhura,” Sulu said, “Get a message to Captain Kirk and the away team. Tell them they’ve got company soon.”

“Communication systems down again, sir. We can only receive messages at the moment.”

\---

“Lapis! Peridot! We’re here!” Steven called out as he and Connie rode in on Lion.

“Are you sure you told them we were coming?” Connie asked.

“Sure! I talked with Peridot about it over video chat this morning.”

Lion stopped at the barn and Steven and Connie stepped out.

When they entered the barn, they saw Lapis and Peridot sitting with the three men Steven had met that morning.

“Jim?” Steven asked.

“Well hello, Steven,” Kirk said, “I presume you know Lapis and Peridot?”

“Yeah, but you do you know them?”

Before Kirk could answer, Peridot blurted out, “They’re hitchhikers! We’re letting them stay here while they wait for their next ride.”

“That,” Kirk said with a pause, “was what I was going to say.”

“This is Jim Kirk and his two friends,” Steven said, introducing the trio to Connie, “I met them in Beach City earlier while we were fighting a monster.”

“Ah,” Connie said, “So, where are you all from?”

“I’m from Iowa. Riverside, to be more specific. Bones?”

“Georgia.”

“And what about him?” Steven asked, pointing to their stoic friend standing by the wall.

“Spock likes to keep private,” Kirk interrupted.

“I see.”

Suddenly, a beeping noise went off.

“Spock, you should take that call outside. Bones, you go help him.”

“Yes, Captain. Doctor?”

Spock and McCoy got up and left the room.

“Wait, you’re a Captain?” Steven asked.

“Uh...yes.”

“Then why are you here?”

“Shore leave.”

“And your friend is a doctor?”

“Yeah, and don’t tell him this but he’s one of the best ones in the galaxy.”

Connie chuckled.

“He’s probably not as great as my mom,” she said.

Kirk smiled.

Meanwhile, Spock and McCoy were searching the area with their tricorders.

“Doctor, are you detecting what I am detecting?”

“Yup, and they’re closing fast.”

At that moment, Ronaldo jumped off the barn roof and fell on Spock.

“Ah-ha!” he shouted, “WHAT is closing fast? And who are you?!”

“Get off him!” McCoy shouted, trying to lift Ronaldo off of Spock.

Just before Spock threw Ronaldo off him, Ronaldo grabbed his communicator and phaser. He quickly got up and pointed the phaser at McCoy.

At that moment, Kirk came running out.

“What on Earth-?”

“Jim, this nutcase got jumped us and got Spock’s phaser!”

“Okay son,” Kirk began, “Put it down.”

“Not until you tell me who you are and what you’re doing here! Are you with the Diamond Authority?”

“RONALDO?!” Steven asked, looking over from the TV-watching balcony.

“Steven! Help me apprehend these intergalactic agents of evildoing!”

Steven floated down and approached Ronaldo.

“Ronaldo, put that down! I’m sure there’s a perfectly logical explanation for whatever it is these three have been up to.”

“Indeed there is,” Spock said.

“Doctor McCoy?” they heard Connie say, “You left this on your seat.”

She came out of the barn holding McCoy’s communicator.

“Ah-ha!” Ronaldo exclaimed as he held out Spock’s identical communicator, “What does this do?”

Kirk blurted out, “Wait, don’t-!” before Ronaldo pressed the emergency signal button.

“...press that button.”

\---

“Sir, emergency beam-out signal coming from Mr. Spock’s communicator,” Uhura said.

“Are the other away team members with him?” Sulu asked.

“Yes.”

“Bridge to Transporter Room. Mr. Kyle, beam up the Away Team now!”

“Are you sure? That’ll be all the transporter power we got.”

“That’s an order, Mr. Kyle.”

“Aye, sir.”

\---

First, Ronaldo began to dematerialize.

Peridot and Lapis emerged from the barn.

“What’s all the hub-bub?” Peridot asked before noticing what was happening.

Kirk and Connie had also begun dematerialization.

“Connie?!” Steven cried out in worry.

Steven impulsively ran to Connie’s aid, inadvertently entering the transporter field with her.

A bright light emanated from them, and Stevonnie came into being, just before they too were beamed away along with Kirk and Ronaldo.

Lapis and Peridot folded their arms and turned to Spock and McCoy.

They would have a lot of explaining to do.


	9. Well There Goes the Prime Directive, Temporal or Otherwise

Three humanoid figures began to materialize on the transporter pads. But to Mr. Kyle’s surprise, instead of Kirk, Spock, and McCoy, it was Kirk, Ronaldo, and Stevonnie. Even Kirk was surprised by the latter.

“Uh...I…” Stevonnie stammered before falling apart into her respective components.

“I’ll ask about that later,” Kirk said, grabbing an awestruck Ronaldo and forcing him off the transporter.

“Get this moron to the brig,” he told the security guard on duty, confiscating the stolen phaser and communicator from Ronaldo.

“Wait! I have so many questions! Please!” Ronaldo called out as he was dragged down the hall.

Kirk turned to Steven and Connie.

“I think you two deserve some answers about all this.”

\---

“Where. Is. Steven.” Lapis said coldly, restraining McCoy and Spock in a giant hand of water.

The familiar sound of a warp pad went off nearby, and Pearl, Amethyst, and Garnet came walking in.

“Peridot, we got your call,” Pearl said, “Are those the ones?”

“Yup, that’s us!” McCoy shouted.

“They disintegrated Steven and Connie!” Peridot exclaimed.

“That is not technically incorrect,” Spock said.

“Oh shut up,” McCoy muttered in response.

“Set them down, Lapis,” Garnet instructed.

“Doctor,” Spock began, “It would be reasonable at this point to inform these people of our true nature.”

Lapis released them from the water hand, dropping them to the ground.

“Ya think?” McCoy coughed out.

“Yes, Doctor,” Spock said as he got up, “Yes, I do.”

Spock took off his hat, revealing his distinctly Vulcan ears.

“My name is Spock. I am the first officer of the Federation Starship Enterprise. We are from an alternate universe, in a alternate 23rd century going by the regular Earth calendar. About three hours ago, we were brought to your universe and time period through a spatial anomaly within this star system, and encountered three small red beings known as Rubies...”

“Wait, wait, wait,” Amethyst said, “Hold up, I have, like, twenty questions.”

“So that’s why you were asking about the Rubies!” Peridot said.

“They stole one of our shuttles,” Spock continued, “And were last detected approaching this location.”

Before any of them could react, they were interrupted by a large explosion in the cornfield, which knocked them all off their feet and into the barn’s front wall. It was one of the Enterprise’s photon torpedoes.

Pearl, Amethyst, and Garnet summoned their weapons.

Through the billowing smoke, the Columbus emerged, battered but still in flight.

\---

“So you’re from the future?!” Steven asked Kirk excitedly.

“An alternate future, yes.”

“Aw, I wanted to have a spaceship when I grew up...”

“Captain Kirk?” Connie asked, “Will you be able to send us back down?”

“I’ll make sure of it.”

“Bridge to Captain Kirk,” he heard Sulu say.

“Kirk here. Go ahead.”

“Captain, we were attacked by the Columbus a short while ago. They damaged several systems, but we’re quickly making progress on repairs.”

“That’s good.”

“Yes sir, but here’s the problem. We fired three photon torpedoes at them, which followed the Columbus into the atmosphere. And just now we’ve picked up three photon torpedo explosions on the planet surface.”

“I’ll be right there.”

Steven grabbed Kirk’s arm.

“Jim, I want to come too. It’s my fault the Rubies were stuck out there in the first place.”

Kirk paused for a moment as he considered Steven’s request.

“Alright, you can come. And bring Connie, too.”

“Really?” Connie said with a huge smile on her face.

“Might as well,” Kirk said with a chuckle, “We’ve broken enough regulations already!”

Steven and Connie took each other’s hands and quickly followed Kirk out into the hall.

This wasn’t how they thought this day would go.

\---

“Halt this instant!” Pearl cried out, aiming her spear at the Columbus.

“Oh sure,” McCoy said, “Try reasoning with the renegade aliens armed with an advanced spacecraft.”

“I’m inclined to agree with Golden Oldie over there,” Amethyst said, “I don’t think the Rubies are playing around anymore.”

“Well neither are we!” Pearl said before firing laser blasts from her spear at the shuttle. Garnet fired her gauntlets at it as well.

They both did nothing.

“Their shields are holding,” Spock said.

At that moment, the shuttle’s deflectors charged up again.

“Move!” Garnet shouted, pushing the group out of the way as the shuttle let out an energy burst.

The burst was suddenly blocked by a wall of water, which deflected the burst back at the Columbus, hitting it and damaging it severely.

“What the-?!” Eyeball exclaimed.

Lapis floated in behind them.

“Rubies!” Lapis said, “It’s over.”

“You IDIOT!” Eyeball shouted at Army, “Why didn’t you remind me that there was a Lapis Lazuli with them? Don’t you remember what happened last time? And the time before that?!”

Before she could even finish that sentence, the shuttle’s hull became super-charged, electrifying the water holding them and thereby electrocuting Lapis.

Lapis let out a scream, and she along with the shuttle and all the water fell the ground.

All the controls in the shuttle shorted out as a result. Eyeball turned around and saw Navy, sitting by the Engineering panel holding a couple of wires.

“Whoopsie-Daisy!” she said, 

“I don’t know whether to thank you or frag you,” Eyeball said with a slight smile.

“Lapis!” Peridot shouted as she ran out to the crash site, “Are you alright?”

Lapis was lying on the ground. Her gem was fine, but her body wasn’t doing too hot.

“Peridot, no!” Garnet called out.

The shuttle doors the opened up behind them, and Eyeball grabbed Peridot by the throat.

“Alright, nobody come any closer!” she said, holding her knife up to Peridot’s head, “I want you Crystal Gems, including the Lapis, as far away from here as possible, or the Peridot gets it!”

“I’m coming over to get Lapis,” Amethyst called out, running to the smoky crash site.

Pearl begun formulating a plan in her head.

Amethyst picked Lapis up and carried her over her shoulder.

“Peridot!” Amethyst yelled.

“Yeah?”

“It’s gonna be alright!”

“What she said…” Lapis muttered weakly.

“Okay,” Pearl began once the others returned to the group, “Peridot said the Roaming Eye was parked behind the barn. If we can get to it, we can get up to that starship and tell them what’s going on.”

“Sounds good to me,” McCoy said.

“The pointy-eared one stays, too!” Eyeball called out, “I need my brand new warship fixed up as soon as possible!”

“I will go,” Spock said.

As he walked towards the shuttle, his hands in the air, the Crystal Gems and McCoy made a break for the Roaming Eye.

\---

“Captain on the Bridge,” Chekov announced as Kirk entered the bridge, Steven and Connie in tow.

Their eyes widened in pure wonder.

“At ease,” Kirk said, “Mr. Sulu, report.”

“We detected three photon torpedo explosions, two in the atmosphere and one on the surface. After the last one we began picking up the Columbus on sensors again near Mr. Spock and Dr. McCoy’s lifesigns, but it appears to have lost power.”

Steven gulped. If anything happened to the Gems or Kirk’s friends, he would feel responsible.

“Can we hail them?” Kirk asked.

“Captain,” Uhura interrupted, “We are being hailed.”

“By the Columbus?”

“No sir, by Dr. McCoy. Audio only.”

“Put him through.”

McCoy’s voice started coming through the speakers.

“Jim?” he asked.

“Bones? What’s going on down there?”

“Sir, an unknown ship is approaching from the port side,” Chekov informed Kirk.

“On screen.”

On the viewscreen, a red spacecraft in the shape of a teardrop appeared.

“The Ruby ship...” Steven said.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And that's just about all the chapters I have finished so far. Don't know when I'll continue this story, but when I do you'll all be the first to know :)


End file.
